Broken
by Devilgirl83
Summary: She felt she had to leave the Straw Hats. She loved them and it felt like home, but after the battle a few weeks ago, she couldn't get herself to stay. It tore her soul apart. She wanted to stay, because she also loved him so much, but ... She didn't feel she was any good for the crew. She never thought they would do anything to get her to stay.
1. Chapter 1

**I wrote this a while ago and have redone it a couple of times. I hope you'll like it.**

**The world of One Piece and the characters belongs to the creator. The story and OC belongs to me.**

* * *

_Dear Love_

_If only I could do everything over, I would do it different. But I can't and that's why I have to leave. I hope that one day you will forgive me for deceiving you for so long time. It was never my intension, but I turned out that way. Feelings can't be controlled and sometimes it's like a storm. I was born to love, but I never received love. Not until I met him. I have to go back, to see him, but I could never come back to you. It would only bring you in danger and that's the last thing I want. Don't go looking for me. Continue your journey and fulfilled your dream. One day it will come true._

_It began on that day at that bar. I was just a waitress with nothing. I was empty. His eyes followed me the whole evening. I could feel it. As my eyes met his, I could feel that he wanted me. First I thought that he only wanted my body. But I was wrong. I was so young and naïve. Without hope, without dreams and no future. He showed me that I had it, but I've just forgotten. It only took him one night. One night to show me, that I was so much more, than just a beautiful young lady. How could I forget his words, his hands on my back? He gave this young lady her dreams back. Only one night. All it took him was one night. I've been thinking of him. Wanted to tell him how grateful I am. He showed me the future and helped me remembering the past. One night._

_It's not love. I'm sure of it. My heart belongs to you. It's just that … I must know how and why. I know that he's on this Island. So I'm going to see him. I hope that he will help me again, like he did at that time. I'm not that strong. You all are so much stronger and you have so much confidence in yourself. I don't have that. I could never live up to you. So that's why our ways have to depart. Please try to understand. I'm weak and you're so strong. I would only be in the way for you all. I have to find my way and future. Tell the others please. But first the day after tomorrow, when you're leaving this Island. I'm not going to be here more, so you would not be able to find me._

_Forgive me for just leaving you with this letter, but I can't say it to our face and I'm afraid that you would hold me close and never let me go. Please don't go looking for me. I can't come with you. I don't have dreams or a future. I'm empty. I only have my love to you, but that's not enough. So just let me go, even though I know it hurts, because it hurts me too._

_Your Love Shira_

He couldn't believe it. She was gone. A tear was falling down from his eye. He never thought that she was going to leave him. Not like this. But he had a feeling. For the last few weeks she was somehow sad and the distance between them was growing. Why couldn't she trust him? They've just been together for two months, but he loves her so much. He knew that she had secrets and a rough childhood. She hadn't told so much of it, but he was so sure that she eventually would do so. Why did she leave? It hurts. He wouldn't leave her. Not like this. She had to tell him face to face. He wrote a note for his nakama. Telling them to leave him and her behind, well knowing that they wouldn't do so.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

"He left a note?" Luffy was looking at Franky.

"Yes saying we had to leave him and Shira behind," said Franky.

"But why? I won't do that," said Luffy. His eyes were glowing with confusing.

"It doesn't say why," said Franky, trying to make sense of the letter.

"Maybe they ran off to get married and will live happily ever after," said Sanji annoyed.

"I don't think so. Shira left Sunny before Zoro. He left, when I came. Without a word," said Franky.

"We have to go looking for them. It's too dangerous to stay at this Island to long," said Nami.

The Strawhat's nodded. But the Island was big and time so short. "I will stay at Sunny, if they return. The rest of you should split up," said Sanji.

They parted in three groups. Luffy and Usopp, Robin and Chopper, Brook, Franky and Nami. They went searching for their lost nakama. Not knowing, that Shira had left them and that Zoro was going after her. They couldn't leave them behind. They were nakama, though that Shira hasn't been that long on the ship. Only six months. But she was their nakama. She was something special. Luffy saw it, when they met, and that was why he wanted her to become their nakama. It took some time, but eventually she gave in and became their nakama. She fell in love with Zoro, and Luffy was happy about it. But now her and Zoro was gone. Without any explanation.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

"Do you think that Sanji is right? That they ran off to get married?" Chopper looked at Robin as they went through the town, searching for them.

"I don't think so. It's not like Zoro to do such things. I was surprise that he even fell in love. But then again, Shira is something special. Even I feel so comfortable around her. She's making us all calm," said Robin.

Chopper nodded. She was not a strong fighter, but everyone around her would calm down. Even their fiends did so. Maybe it was some sort of Haki, like Luffy had. Her blue-violet eyes were so warm. "Maybe she ran off and Zoro is following her," he mumbled.

"That is a possibility," said Robin.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

"Oi Shira. Zoro. Where are you?" shouted Luffy as they were searching the forest.

"Oi Shira. Zoro," shouted Usopp. There was no answer. The only thing they could hear, was the sound of the animals, wind and water. Usopp sighed.

"We will find them," said Luffy with confidence.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

"Why did they leave?" asked Franky confused.

"Maybe Zoro has done something, that she didn't liked, dumped him and us, and now he's trying to get her back," said Nami.

"Do you think that it is simply as this?" asked Brook.

"No. Zoro was really in love with her, but for some weeks things seemed different. She was not that happy. I'm sure, that she loves Zoro, but for some reason she was … sad," said Franky.

"Then it might be something Zoro said or did. Why else would she leave?" asked Nami.

"Well she didn't want to be our nakama at first," said Franky.

"None of us did. We all somehow refused to become Luffy's nakama at first, but now none of us would do it over and choose another path," said Nami.

"You're right. We can only guess. Let us find her," said Brook. Nami and Franky nodded.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

He was wandering without noticing anything around him. He was confused and hurt. He wanted answer and she was the only one who could give them to him. His feet carried him for a couple of hours, before he looked up. He had followed a path along the mountain and was now looking at a bay. There was a pirate ship. The Jolly Roger was fluttering in the wind. He knew this Jolly Roger, but he had not expected to see it here. His feelings told him, that she was on board this ship. Slowly he stared to wander down to the ship. Hoping that his feelings didn't deceive him.

"Stop right there Roronoa Zoro. I can't allow you to get any further," said a man's voice from the tree beside him.

"I did expect that someone was on watch. I can't allow you to delay me any further. I know that she is down there," said Zoro.

The man jumped down. He looked at Zoro. "Forget her. Woman only means trouble. Go back to your captain and tell him, that she won't come back," the man said.

"You look familiar. You don't happen to be the father of our sniper Usopp?" asked Zoro.

The man smiled. "My name is Yasopp and I'm the sniper of the Red Hair pirates. It is true, that I have a son with the name of Usopp. You have to go Roronoa Zoro. She won't see you," said Yasopp.

"She has to. The letter she left, gave more questions. Besides she has to tell our captain in person, that she is leaving the crew," said Zoro.

"You can't see her now. Just leave her here. I'm not saying, that you should leave the Island, but leave her here for the night being. We won't hurt her or take her with us. But you have to leave her for now," said Yasopp. His voice was not asking neither demanding. It was like a statement. Zoro sighed and glanced at the ship. He was so close to her, but still so far away.

"I'm staying here," he said. Yasopp looked at him, knowing that Zoro was not going anywhere.

"You love her that much?" he asked. Zoro nodded. Yasopp looked down at his ship. Right now she was with Shanks and Benn. It would be so complicated.

"You have to go back to your ship Roronoa. They must be looking for you and I don't want them to come to this bay. It's too early for the captains to meet. Someone of our crew, that your captain doesn't know, will come for you tomorrow," said Yasopp trying to make Zoro understand, that they would not let him down or back off.

"I won't. If you want me back at my ship, you have to drag me there. And I won't make it easy for you," he said.

"Just leave Zoro. I will talk to Luffy tomorrow, but just leave for now," said a soft, but sad voice. Zoro looked to his right. Shira was standing on a cliff. Beside her stood the captain of the Red Hair pirates; Shanks. His hand was on her shoulder. Her eyes were sad and he could see, that she had cried.

"Shira …," he started.

"Don't say anything. I can't talk about it. Please leave Zoro. Tell Luffy, that I'm coming to talk to him tomorrow." He could see the tears in her eyes. It hurt him.

"I'll tell him." Zoro looked hurt, turned around and went back.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

"Where is Shira?" asked Sanji, as Zoro came back. The others had returned too.

"I can't tell, but she will be back tomorrow. She wants to talk to you Luffy. I'm off to bed," said Zoro and left them standing confused.

He lay on his bed. He couldn't sleep. His heart was crying and he couldn't stop thinking of her. He loved her so much, but she was drifting away from him. He tried to catch her, but she was like an eel. Smooth and slipped through his hands. Tears were slowly fallen from his eyes. Never had he thought that love could hurt him so much. It had took him with storm and made him feel so warm. Was it over? Would he ever be together with her again? Why did it happen to him? If only it had been someone else.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

She walked to the bay, where she knew he would be. The man, who had given her so much in only one night. If only he would help her again. She needed his guidance. Her feet took her to the bay. The man, who was on watch jumped down from the tree and followed her to his captain. They didn't say anything to each other. None was talking to her. Most of them didn't know who she was.

"You can go in Shira. He's waiting for you," he said and left her.

She sighed and opened the door. She walked in and closed the door behind herself. He was sitting with a glass of Sake. He didn't say anything, was just sitting there and looked at her. She couldn't move or look into his eyes. Slowly he stood up and walked towards her, with a worried look in his eyes. She looked down.

"What happened to you?" he asked and took her chin in his hand, making her look up at him.

Tears were fallen from her eyes. He took her hand and made her come to his bed. He made her sit down and sat beside her. She couldn't say anything at first. He looked so concerned. "Tell me Shira. What had happened to you?" his voice were worried.

"I became the nakama of Luffy. At first I didn't want to, but then I couldn't resist. He could help me, so my dream could come true. It was really a good time, I even fell in love with Zoro. I'm still in love with him. But I can't stay. It would only endanger them. I'm not that strong. I can't be at the sea in the new world. I have to leave them."

He looked at her. He could really imagine that Luffy wanted her in his crew. "You don't know do you?" He asked. She looked at him with a confused look.

"Know what?" she asked.

He smiled. "Never mind that now. I'll tell you later. Come and join us for dinner," he said. At the same time someone knocked at the door. "Come on in," he said.

Benn walked in and sent Shira a smile. "It's good to see you again angel. Would you like to eat with some old friends?" he asked.

She smiled back. "I would love to," she replied.

She did feel much better, now that she was with him. He stayed by her side the whole time and Benn too. She was introduced as an old nakama. Those who knew her, knew better, but it would have been too complicated to explain it, so they just call her an old nakama.

"Zoro is here," she suddenly said and looked up to the path.

Shanks looked at her. "Really? Well Yasopp would take care of it," he said.

"I don't think that Zoro would leave. I have to tell him myself, but …" she couldn't say anymore. She suddenly stood up and walked away. Benn and Shanks followed her to they were alone.

"Shira …" said Benn worried and took her in his arms. She cried. Shanks stood behind her, with his hand on her shoulders.

"It's ok. You don't need to go. I can take care of it by myself," said Shanks.

"No. He wouldn't move. It has to be me, who tells him to leave," she said sad and loosened herself from Benn. It hurt her. She wanted to see him and then on the other side she didn't want to see him again. She sighed light.

Shanks nodded. "I go with you. Benn, prepare a room for Shira. She will sleep on our ship tonight. He looked at her, knowing that it was that she wanted and needed. Benn smiled at her as he walked back to the ship.

Shira and Shanks walked up to the path. She was right. Zoro was standing there, arguing with Yasopp. She heard, that they had to drag him back, if they wanted him to go back. Shira was standing on a cliff. Beside her stood Shanks. His hand was on her shoulder. Her eyes were sad and he could see, that she had cried.

"Just leave Zoro. I will talk to Luffy tomorrow, but just leave for now," said Shira with a soft, but sad voice. Zoro looked to his right.

"Shira …," he started.

"Don't say anything. I can't talk about it. Please leave Zoro. Tell Luffy, that I'm coming to talk to him tomorrow." He could see the tears in her eyes. It hurt him.

"I'll tell him." Zoro looked hurt, turned around and went back.

She followed him, as he went back. Tears were fallen from her eyes. Yasopp came to her and gave her a hug. "I don't know what you're going through right now Shira, but I'm always here for you. And so is Zoro. He loves you."

"I know, but it's so difficult to stay on a ship, where I can't protect myself. It's not that I dislike them; it's just so hard to be weak on Thousand Sunny. It's not like Luffy is avoiding danger," she sighed.

Yasopp looked at her. Was that her problem? He shook his head. She was so strong. Didn't she know? He looked at his captain who shook his head. She didn't know. "Shira… We'll help you. You have to protect your love. And call me romantic, but I would do everything to help you, so you can be with Zoro. You love him too," he said.

She nodded her head. "I really love him, but it's just … I can't be with him right now." She turned around and starts walking down to the ship, but stopped. "Do you think that I'm strong?" she asked, as she turned around and looked at Yasopp.

"I know you are Shira. You just don't believe it yet. Captain, will you tell her?" he asked Shanks.

"That was my intension. We have to wake her up. Want to help? I can make Rockstar take your watch. I think it would be the right thing to do," Shanks said.

"Then I'll await Rockstar," said Yasopp.

Shira turned around and walked away. Shanks followed her. "Please go to my room, when you arrive at the ship Shira. I'll be there soon," he said and walked to the camp. Shira just nodded her head and did as he asked. As she came into his room, she saw that Benn was awaiting them. He had already set up some drinks. She took a glass of red wine and sat down. Shortly after Shanks came and sat beside her and took her hand. Nobody said anything, until Yasopp and Lucky Roo came in and sat down.

"Men we have a little problem with our 'daughter'. She doesn't really believe in herself," said Shanks looking at them all. Shira looked down. Knew it was harsh, but true. She couldn't see the things that they saw.

"Well that's not the first time. What is it this time?" said Lucky Roo.

She looked up. "I'm not strong enough to be with my love and those I care for," she said with tears fallen from her eyes.

"Defined 'strong', Shira. Is it physically? Then yes, you're not as strong as Luffy, Zoro and Sanji, but they are on a different level. Your ability is mentally. Do you know about Haki and conquers Haki?" Lucky Roo asked.

Shira looked confused. "Haki and conquers Haki? I know of it, because Luffy uses it. But what matter does it have here?"

Lucky Roo smiled at her and looked at Shanks. "She really doesn't know. I'm sure, that Luffy knows," he said.

"Shira, you can use Conquers Haki and yours are much stronger than anyone else's. Even stronger than mine. You may not think about it, but when you're around all calm down somehow and gain strength and confidence. It's because of you," said Shanks, still holding her hand. She looked at him. Did she calm anyone down?

"I can see that you're confused, but it's true," said Benn.

Shira closed her eyes. Thinking about what they said about her and tried to remember if she had used this ability without noticing. She thought of the day she met Luffy. It was a raining day. She was living on an autumn Island. They were in need of shelter and she gave it to them. It was Luffy, Robin and Chopper. She liked them, even though they were infamous pirates. They reminded her of Shanks and his crew. Luffy had been furious about something, but shortly after he was calm. Even Chopper was calm and not afraid of her. She remembered Nami telling her that Chopper always felt insecure around strangers, but he never did that around her. She opened her eyes again and looked at her friends.

"They are calm around me, but do I do it all the time?" she asked.

"No, but when it is needed," said Yasopp.

"You just used it to convince Zoro to leave earlier. You have to learn to use it properly or else you would endanger those, who are not as strong as you. The only reason, why none have fainted yet, is because you don't have confidence in yourself," said Shanks.

"How? I don't want to hurt my friends," she said.

"You won't hurt them. Let Luffy guide you. And follow your heart," said Benn.

She sighed. It was so easy to say, but she was afraid. She couldn't protect herself. She was weak, and now her friends, her 'fathers' told her that she was strong enough to be with Luffy. Even if she learnt to use Conquers Haki, she would still be weak.

"Don't think about your physical condition Shira. You are a great fighter. Your problem is your confidence. Try to remember your dream," said Yasopp.

"I almost died a few weeks ago. It was Zoro who saved my life, but by doing this, he was badly hurt. If I was stronger …"

"Stop right there Shira. Don't blame yourself. There will always be someone who is stronger than you. You have amazing nakama that will protect you. And you protect them. Don't give up on yourself like that. If you don't feel strong, then become stronger," said Shanks.

He was really concerned. What had happened? When they left her, she had confidence and courage, but that was gone now. It couldn't be Luffy's fault. Who had done this to her? He looked at the other and could see that they thought the same. He took her hand.

"Shira tell me what happened?" he asked.

Tears fell from her eyes. "I can't," she mumbled.

He took her into his arm. "It's ok. I'm not mad at you. Only concerned. It's late. Try to get some sleep. Tomorrow you have to talk to Luffy. I would be near you, but hiding. Rockstar will bring you back," he said.

She nodded and stood up. She wished them a good night and went into her room.

"She's broken. I can't believe it. Something must have happened to her, since we left. If only we had taken her with us," said Lucky Roo.

"We couldn't. But I wish that we had," said Yasopp.

"I really hope that Luffy can help her. Even though she calls them her nakama, she doesn't trust them completely. Not even her love," said Benn.

"If she doesn't leave with Luffy we will take her with us," said Shanks.

* * *

**I've decided to upload bot Chapters to you, so you can leave a review after the second chapter.**


	2. Chapter 2

**So here is Chapter 2.**

* * *

She saw Sunny. Rockstar was walking beside her. Her feet got heavier and heavier. Suddenly she stopped. Her body was shaking.

"If I'm not mistaken, they won't have a big grudge on you, when you tell them what you're feeling," said Rockstar.

"They can't possibly understand," she replied.

"How do you know that?" he asked.

She sighed. How could they? They were just … Maybe … No …

"Shira."

She looked up. Luffy and Zoro was standing in front of her.

"Thanks for bringing me here Rockstar," she said.

Rockstar nodded. "I'm glad that I met you. Hopefully we'll meet again someday," he said as he turned around and left them.

"Why did you leave yesterday?" asked Luffy.

"Luffy … I had fun with you, but I'm not strong enough to follow you anymore," she said.

"Bullshit. That can't be your reason Shira. We're nakama and we protect each other. Some of us would be in a greater danger than others, but I can protect my nakama. Why do you really want to leave?" he asked.

She couldn't look into his eyes. "Please don't make me tell you why. I don't want you to know," she said.

Her face showed pain. Luffy had seen the pain and despair of his nakama, but none of them had so much pain and suffering written in their face, as she had. He walked to her, took his hat and gave it to her.

"No matter what pain or what you did suffered, I will always protect you. None one will ever hurt you again. Tell me Shira," he said. His voice was full of concern.

"You … you wouldn't understand. It's too hard for me to tell. Luffy you're a great captain, but you can't heal my heart," she said, while giving him his hat back. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

Luffy looked at her and then at Zoro. He was confused. "Make me understand. I want to understand. Is it something that happened on the ship? Or in the battle few weeks ago? How can I help you, if you don't trust me?" he asked.

"Four years ago I was a waitress without hope, dream and a future. Just an empty girl. One day a pirate crew walked in. The captain kept an eye on me the whole day. He came to me in the evening and stayed beside me for a whole night. He showed me my dreams. He woke me up. I was so grateful and I started to live again. But then … A year before you came … I can't," she looked away.

"Shira …" started Luffy

"Luffy. I hoped that I could forget and become the woman that I had become after the Captain left me. But I can't. Please forgive me. I shouldn't have joined your crew. It was a mistake," she cut him off.

He was confused and looked at Zoro. The pain he saw in Zoro's eyes was great. Shira was not looking at Zoro. Not even once as she started too talked to him. Luffy was wondering why it was like this. Why didn't she trust him?

"If you can't tell me, who can you tell?" asked Luffy.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

Shanks looked at her. He could hear everything clearly, from his hiding place. What had happened to her a year ago? He wanted to know. She was scared and ashamed. Something or someone had terrified her and broke her spirit. Her will to live. If only she would tell it.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

Shira looked away. "Please Luffy. It's too hard for me to tell. I can't go through that again. I thought I could forget, but … I can't," she said with tears fallen down her cheeks.

Luffy laid a hand on her shoulder. "Was it something that those pirates did to you?" he asked.

She looked at him with fear and shame in her eyes. This was answer enough for him. He looked furious and angered. If only he had known sooner, he would have crushed them.

"Nobody will ever get away with hurting my nakama," he said and turned around to Zoro. "We have to find those pirates and teach them a lesson. Tell the others," he said.

Zoro nodded and walked back to the ship. Luffy looked at Shira again. "You're my nakama Shira. I will crush them. They hurt you, but I will teach them a lesson. They're properly still after us. Let me show you, how much you mean to me. No, how much you mean to us. You're not weak Shira. You're strong and I'm only stronger, when you are by my side. Come with me. You don't have to tell what had happened a year ago. Just trust us and in yourself," he said.

Shira couldn't bear it and sank down. Luffy was too good to her and how did she replied? She wished that she could tell him, but he wouldn't understand. Maybe she should talk to someone. She wanted to. It tore her apart.

"Luffy … Please let me talk to Robin," she asked and looked at him.

He smiled at her. "I will tell her to come. You can trust her. She wouldn't tell anybody else, if you don't want her to," he said and walked back to Sunny.

She looked at the place where Shanks was hiding. She knew that he was there, even though she couldn't see him. He would properly kill those pirates, when he heard what they did to her. She was so ashamed of herself. She blamed herself for what had happened a year ago.

Robin walked up to her and sat beside her. "Luffy told me that you wanted to talk with me," she said.

"I want to tell someone the terror I lived through for two months. It started a year ago. I'm not sure that Luffy would understand, in fact I don't want him or someone else to know this, but it's rips me apart. I trust you a little and I'm sure that you can keep it a secret," said Shira.

"I won't tell them," she said.

"As I told Luffy, I met a pirate crew four years ago. I was a lonely child with no friends or family. The Captain of this crew showed me my dreams and future and it only took him a night. I was so grateful and I started to live again. But then a year ago another pirate group came and tore it apart. My dreams and my soul. It was properly my own fault," she said with a sad voice.

"If they tore your dreams and soul apart, it couldn't have been you own fault," said Robin.

"They came to my house, knowing that I lived alone. It was only the Captain and his first mate. The first two nights they were polite and friendly, but then … I shouldn't have let them in … Robin they took advantage of me sexually. And I couldn't say no or stop them. I was too weak. For two month they stayed. Beating me and raped me, as often they could. And I let them do it …"

Shira took her head in her hands and cried. Couldn't take it anymore. Living with the shame and memories was too painful, but she hadn't the courage to take her own life. Robin took her in her arms, terrified by her story. She wanted to kill the Captain and his first mate of this crew.

"Two weeks before they left, the whole crew raped me. They were about 45 members," she said. Her voice was empty.

"Shira … I will kill them. That was never your fault. You have a good heart and they took advantage of it. I'll tell Luffy to kill them. They should not only be crushed, but vanished from this world. If they did this to you, they might do it to someone else or even had do it lot of times to others. Let us protect you and others. We will never let anyone do this to you again. Never," she said furious.

"Robin …" Shira couldn't say anymore.

She stood up and walked to the tree line. Robin followed her. Shira looked back and couldn't see Sunny. It was save for her, to talked to him. Robin wouldn't tell anybody.

Shanks came out from his hiding. "Shira … Why didn't you tell me this yesterday?" he asked.

"Shanks… Do you think less of me know?" she asked with fear in her voice.

Shanks took her in his arm. "No… I would never do that. You're precious to me. If Luffy doesn't kill that bastard and his crew, we will. Can I tell Ben, Yasopp and Lucky Roo you story?" he asked.

She nodded. "Please help me Captain. I can't take it anymore," she whispered.

"I will. Let me give you an advice. Go with Luffy. I'm sure that he can protect you. And tell your love what happened. He will understand," said Shanks and kissed her head.

As Robin saw Shanks, she understands that he was the captain that Shira was talking about. The Captain that showed her, her dreams and future. The way he talked to Shira was like a father talking to his daughter. He acknowledged Shira's love to Zoro and encouraged her to talk to him.

"Robin please take good care of her. I can trust you, not to tell Luffy that we are here. We'll secretly follow you. Please tell me, the name of the pirates, who hurt Shira," he said to her.

"The Black Rose. I will not tell Luffy about you. You were the Captain that showed Shira her dreams and future. It's like she is your daughter," said Robin.

"I'm thinking of her as my daughter. She's one of a million. I could tell at that time that she possesses the Conquers Haki. Please help her understand it," he said.

"I will. Come Shira. Luffy is awaiting us," she said and handed her hand to her.

Shira looked at Shanks, who nodded and then she took Robin's hand. "Shanks … You and the others are my fathers. Please tell them that I love them. I hope that we would meet again," she said.

"I'll tell them. I'm sure that they love you. I know I do," he said.

"And I … I love you too," she said and smiled at him, before leaving him.

Together with Robin she walked back to Sunny. She could feel his eyes on her and she felt so loved. She looked at Robin, who sent her a friendly and encouraging smile. Shira looked at Sunny and felt insecure. Could she ever tell Zoro what had happened to her. She stopped and sighed. Would he understand?

"I'm sure that he would understand. I've never seen Zoro so in love and as he came back yesterday he went straight to bed. His eyes were full of pain and confusion. Even as he went back to tell Luffy's order, he was suffering. Shanks are right. You need to tell him," said Robin.

"But … I'm scared to do so," she said.

"If you want to, I will help you," she said.

"Maybe I will need our help," Shira replied and started to walk.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

"Good to see you again Shira. Luffy tells us to kick those pirates again for you," said Sanji.

"Luffy … We are not going to just crush them. We are going to kill them. What they did is unforgivingly. They don't deserve to live anymore," said Robin with a cold and hatred voice.

Luffy looked at her and then at Shira. Her eyes were empty and sad. It hurt him to see those eyes. "Would it help you Shira?" he asked.

"If I can be assured that I never would see them again, it would help," she replied with an empty voice.

He had never killed a fiend before and looked at his nakama. Nami, Chopper and Usopp looked concerned and uncomfortable. Zoro's eyes were ready to do anything for Shira and so were Sanji's. Franky were confused and awaiting Luffy's order. Brook didn't say anything.

"You don't have to kill them if you can't. I'll told my friend and he will kill them," said Shira.

"And if I can't kill them, would you leave us?" asked Luffy.

"I don't know. It depends on the outcome," she said.

Luffy nodded. "I understand. I will do my best to show you that you're safe with me," he said.

"We all will. Shira you're our nakama. If you want us to kill them, I will do so," said Sanji.

"Mina … I would rather not see those pirates again," she said.

"Then you won't have to. You can stay inside the ship, while we're fighting those pirates," said Usopp.

She nodded and went inside. "I'm sorry for making you do this," she said before she went inside.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

They set off. Shira was sitting in the kitchen. Tears were fallen down from her eyes. It was so painful. Robin came in to her and sat beside her. She didn't say anything, but Shira felt relieved and happy.

"Do you think they can do it?" she asked Robin.

"I don't know, but properly not. But don't be afraid, Shira. You'll never see those pirates again. _He_ will kill them. You know that he would. So whatever is going to happen, you'll never have to face them again," said Robin.

"Asking a Yonko to kill my enemies, is not what makes me proud. Even though he see me as a daughter. I really wanted to be a pirate, become stronger. I wanted to see the world. It has been my dream since I was a kid. My uncle was a pirate, but my mother denied everything. The reason why I was alone, was because the Marine locked my mother up. She was the sister of a certain pirate. I did escape," said Shira.

"You mother was locked up because of her brother? Who was he?" asked Robin.

Shira looked around. She had noticed that Sanji and Luffy had entered the kitchen. She looked at Luffy, knowing that this would shock him the most. She sighed and looked at Robin.

"The only reason I escaped was because of a vice-admiral. He told me that my uncle had said that children are innocent. No children should be accused for the crimes of their parents or family. I was only 4 years old as they found out who my mother was. They want the bloodline to disappear. Thanks to the vice-admiral I lived and he told me that the son of my uncle also was alive. I did meet him. Three years ago. He was so happy," she said and closed her eyes and remembered that day.

"Who were they? Your uncle and his son?" asked Sanji.

Shira opened her eyes again and looked at Luffy. "My mother was locked away because she was the sister of the pirate king. Portgas D. Ace was my cousin. The vice-admiral who helped me escape and kept my identity secret was Monkey D. Garp."

Luffy, Sanji and Robin looked at her. They couldn't believe what she was telling them. She was the niece of Roger?

"Shira … Why didn't you tell us before?" asked Luffy.

"I … I couldn't. I was too afraid," she said.

"Who's your father?" asked Sanji.

"I can't tell you that right now. He doesn't know either. When I meet him, I will tell him. That's one of the reason I'm with you. I might get a chance to meet him," she replied.

"I can't believe it. Did you tell Ace?" asked Luffy.

"Yes. At first he was furious, but then he was happy. He told me about you. That's why I let you into my house. If it would have been any other I wouldn't have done so, but I knew I could trust you. I was so sad, when he died. But I know where his grave is and someday we will go together to see it," she said.

"You know where? I would be so happy to see it, but how do you know?" Luffy asked.

"Marco came to me and told me. A friend of mine had asked him to do so," she said.

"That makes me happy. Shira please don't you ever leave me. You are not only my nakama now, but also my family," said Luffy.

She looked at him with a smile. How easy it sounded when Luffy talked about her staying. If only she was so certain that she could stay, without endanger them again.

"Shira … We understands your feelings and forgive you. Please stay with us. Leave it to us to learn you about you Haki and your true strength," said Robin.

"Yosh Shira is staying. I'll teach you everything and kill those pirates. They hurt you before we met right?" said Luffy.

Shira nodded.

"Then it's clear. The Black Rose is going down," he said and left the kitchen.

Shira smiled after him. "He reminds me of Ace. There were some bullies in the town, which didn't let me be. After I told Ace who I was, he chased them away. I can really trust o guys, right?" She looked at Robin and Sanji.

"Of course you can trust us. If you want us to kill them, I would do so," said Sanji.

Robin smiled at her. "See Shira, we're your nakama and we stick together," she said.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

They were setting off. Knowing it would take time, before they found those pirates again, Shira went outside. She wanted to talk to Zoro, but couldn't find the courage. So she went to Robin, asking for advice. Afterwards she walked up to Zoro, who was training at the back of the ship.

"Shira …" he said.

"I'm so sorry Zoro. Please forgive me," she said. She couldn't help the tears from falling down.

He walked to her and took her in his arms. "Please tell me Shira. I can't bear seeing that sad face of yours. It reminds me of our first meeting. Do you remember? All I wanted, no all I want, is to see you happy and with a smile in your eyes," he said.

"Would you help me? I want to live happy. But I'm afraid you wouldn't forgive me. Not after my story," she said sad.

"Shira … Pleas just tell me," he replied.

She sighed and told him, what the Black Rose pirates did to her. She couldn't look into his eyes. Even after telling Robin and Shanks it, she thought it was her own fault. If she was as strong as they told her, she could have protected herself. As she finished, she was crying.

"I'll kill them," said Zoro with a cold voice.

She looked at him with a chock.

"I'll kill them for hurting you. For using you kind heart. For breaking your spirit. I'll kill every each of them. None shall live," he said and held her tight.

"Zoro …"

"Don't say anymore my love. I can't forgive them. You did nothing wrong. Nothing. It was not your fault. I still love you. Even more, because you show me your trust. Shira I'll protect you and I'll help you to get stronger. Whatever it takes to make you happy I'll do it," he said.

She cried with her head on his chest. Letting all of her fear go. He held her tight. He felt relieved that it wasn't something he had done. Those bastards would learn his revenge. He looked up and saw Sanji. His face was filled with anger, which showed Zoro that he had heard everything. Zoro knew that Sanji also would kill them.

"Thanks Zoro. For not leaving me, when I needed you the most, even though I pushed you away," she said after a while.

"Shira … I knew something wasn't right and my heart was crying, because you didn't let me in. But I kept hoping that you would, so I did not gave up on you. I love you more than I ever imagine I could love someone. I'm happy that you let me in your heart. I'll never leave you," he said and kissed her.

She closed her eyes and kissed him back. Filled with love, she began to hope and wishing for a better future. She knew that he would take it slow and let her lead the way. He loved her and she loved him. Suddenly she realized that she hadn't told him that she loved him. She did write it, but she hadn't said it.

"Zoro … I love you. You make me complete and I feel happy when I'm with you. I'm sure that my dreams will come true, when I stay by your side," she said.

Zoro looked at her with happiness. It was the first time she told him. "Say it again Shira. It sounded so wonderful coming from you lips," he whispered.

"I love you," she whispered and kissed him.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

After a few days they found the Black Rose pirates again. Shira was in the library as Usopp shouted that he had spotted them. A cold shiver ran through her spine and she closed the book. She didn't want to fight, but at least she could see her nakama fight. She knew they would fight for her sake. Somehow she felt bad for letting them safe her. And that if they failed to kill the pirates, Shanks would do so.

_'Conquers Haki. I've heard about it. If I possess it, then I could use it. I could fight. No. I'm not strong enough. I would only get in their way, but actually it's my fight. I was molested by those pirates. It was me who got hurt, not them. How can I call myself their nakama, when they fight my battles?'_

Shira looked at the battle. Zoro was really not holding back and there was a lot of blood on the other pirate ship. Even Sanji was fighting harder. Zoro had told her that Sanji had heard her as she confessed her story to him. Knowing Sanji, she understood why he fought that way, but it was Luffy's anger that made her stay where she was. He was the captain and they hurt her. His nakama. She could see that she and his crew meant everything for him and this was what you got if you ever hurt one of his nakama.

_'He freed my village from Arlong. I tried on my own, I tried to push him away, yet he stayed, waiting for me to ask for help. As I did, he showed me how strong his bond for me was. That I was his nakama no matter what I told him. I only tried to save his life, because I thought he wouldn't be able to defeat Arlong, but I was wrong. From that day I trust Luffy. He might get us into many dangers, but he'll always get us out again. That's just who he is.'_ Nami's words stroke her thoughts.

Shira knew she didn't have to fight now. This was Luffy's way of telling her that she belonged on his ship. That she was his nakama. He had saved all from his crew and now it was her time to be saved. He didn't care why he had to fight to save her. He only had to know who. The only reason he needed was that she needed them to be gone.

So Shira stayed at the library, looking at the battle. Her nakama fighting for her. A sad, but also happy smile played on her lips. This was her home and right now her nakama called her home. She couldn't help feeling home. Her eyes wandered over the battlefield and to the horizon, where she barely could see a ship sailing. She knew it was Shanks.

-xxxxxxxxxxx-

"We did it," said Luffy as Shira came down to the grass, where her nakama was gathered after the fight.

They had sank the enemy's ship and left them to fate. Shira knew that Shanks would investigate it and kill those who survived. She didn't like the thought, but then again she felt relieved that she wouldn't have to deal with them again. She would never see them again and she was free from their laughs.

"Thanks captain," she said.

"Are you alright?" asked Luffy.

"Yeah. I only wished I had been strong enough to help you. After all it was my problem," said Shira.

"It was my problem. They hurt you and you are my nakama," said Luffy firm.

"Aye captain," she smiled.

Zoro pulled her into his arms. "Don't feel guilt for not being able to fight. You will grow and you will get stronger. None of us has been this strong from the beginning. We have grown and trained hard. I'll help you, my love," he said softly.

She leaned her head against his chest. In her heart and mind she thanked Shanks for helping her soul 4 years ago and she thanked Luffy for doing the same right now. This was truly were she belonged. When she met with Shanks once more, she would tell him everything. Because she needed him to know. She smiled up to Zoro. Love was a powerful thing.

"I have finally found my home," she said and looked at every single nakama.

* * *

**Like always, Luffy has to safe the soul of his nakama, to get her to stay.**

**I hope you liked the story. Please leave me a review to tell me what you think.**


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